Joined: Tue Dec 30 2003 Location: Lincolnshire England Posts: 2080
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the > > month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and > > he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy > > guide that should be as common as a driver's license > > in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or > > significant other! > >> >> >> > DANGEROUS: What's for dinner? > >> > SAFER: Can I help you with dinner? > >> > SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner? > >> > ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate > >> >> >> > DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that? > >> > SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown. > >> > SAFEST: WOW! Look at you! > >> > ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate > >> >> >> > DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about? > >> > SAFER: Could we be overreacting? > >> > SAFEST: Here's my paycheck. > >> > ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate > >> >> >> > DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that? > >> > SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left. > >> > SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that? > >> > ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate > >> >> >> > DANGEROUS: What did you do all day? > >> > SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today. > >> > SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe! > >> > ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate. > >> >> >> > 13 Things PMS Stands For > >> > 1. Pass My Shotgun > >> > 2. Psychotic Mood Shift > >> > 3. Perpetual Munching Spree > >> > 4. Puffy Mid-Section > >> > 5. People Make me Sick > >> > 6. Provide Me with Sweets > >> > 7. Pardon My Sobbing > >> > 8. Pimples May Surface > >> > 9. Pass My Sweatpants > >> > 10. Pissy Mood Syndrome > >> > 11. Plainly; Men Suck > >> > 12. Pack My Stuff > >> > And my favorite one... > >> > 13. Potential Murder Suspect > >> >> >> > Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and > > those who might need a > >> > good Laugh! Or men who need a warning. > >> > And remember: Money talks.... But Chocolate sings > >> > Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, > > and it's up to women > >> > to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into > > something acceptable to > >> > have dinner with.